Day 16
I'm reading more from The Let Them Theory and I'm almost done with the section about comparison.
The point Mel tries to make is that comparison doesn't need to be a bad thing and that it can in fact fuel a fire that you might not have been tending to. And although I do understand the optimistic outlook on comparison / jealousy here, I don't fully agree with it.
Mel writes, "Comparison shows you the areas of your life that need more of your attention." I could be misinterpreting this due to my own stance on specific things, but I find this to be a very damaging piece of advice. I believe in the saying fully that comparison is the thief of all joy. I don't think there is usually much positivity that can come from comparing yourself to others.
I also think there is a difference between comparing yourself to someone versus just admiring their life or work ethic or something along those lines that has allowed for them to get where they're at now. Admiration can create more motivation and good within you, but comparison simply or at least reactively stirs negative feelings. And yes, those feelings can technically be turned positive, but I think it should be focused on to not compare but admire.
I think that stating comparison shows what areas of your life need more attention can be so damaging because as humans we are not typically very discerning with what we do or don't compare ourselves against. Jealousy is a very automatic feeling and so is comparing yourself to someone else. Just because your brain tells you that you suck because you don't know how to crochet like someone else online or you suck because you don't have the same physique as another girl, doesn't mean you need to start focusing on that. Just because your brain told you that someone is better than you, doesn't mean they are.
I also think it's a damaging statement specifically in today's day where most everyone has social media and sees performative posts constantly while scrolling. Of course, those performative tiktoks or instagram posts are not actually real life. That isn't definitive of who that person is or their character, and worst of all, you don't even know if it's real.
For instance, someone online can say that they make a certain amount of money per year and have so much opportunity that you don't have, but it might not even be completely true! So why, according to "Let Them," should people compare to then consider what they can focus on more within their own life.
To me, that just sounds like a way to create a life with little depth and individuality because you'll constantly be looking to others for them to show you what facets of your life need more work.